It’s a prayer you have been praying for a long time. Probably years. Nobody knows about it except you. And Him. He knows your prayer. He hears it. And He waits. So you wait too. And the prayer grows in love for the one you pray for. And your heart softens for the one you pray for. You keep praying this secret prayer despite the darkness, frustration, and pain you feel. And your heart softens even more. Then one day, unexpectedly, the prayer is answered. And you keep the secret in your heart. Gladly. Joyfully. Nobody will ever know about that prayer. Except you. And Him. And all glory and honor go up to heaven.
I awaken to find you there again, ready to greet me Lord. You know all about me, every part of me. You are not interested in my talents or my strengths. You are not looking where I have it all figured out.
No, that’s just not it. That’s just where I don’t get it.
It’s that scary place. When the lightning and the thunder roared so loud and the house shook as if it might fall to the ground. When I was a child that place made me tremble like a skinny leaf. That’s when I looked for you. When I cried out to you.
Now I’m old and the thunder doesn’t scare me so much. Now I’m hardened with thick scars. Am I not strong? Just look at me and see how strong I am.
Yet in the stillness before the dawn you offer me what I can not give myself. You offer to heal and restore me in places I can not. The places where I am weak and still tremble at the storm.
Take this little boy’s hand. Heal this little boy’s heart. I cry out to you again.
What does it mean when everything around you appears to be going up in flames and you remain standing strong?What does it mean when even as things get worse your optimism grows? How does it happen that even though you know a certain burden will be part of your life for years to come that instead of weighing you down it allows you to reach great heights? What does it mean when despite your failures you see how much you’ve grown? How can it be that your teenager rages against you and you manage (just barely) to respond with patience and service? How does it happen that when you are pinching your pennies until they bleed and humiliation has been poured upon you that you are not broken? And what about when you lose someone and you still find a reason to wake up everyday and breathe life in? How do you wrestle against physical pain, day after day, but each day still somehow fills you with wonder and thanksgiving? When someone hurts you again and again where do you get strength?
The forces around you seek to tear you apart and you hear a voice that says, “It will not take place. It will not happen.” What does this mean? What do they call it?
They call it GRACE. Get some. It’s free… you just have to ask. You will soar on wings like eagles.
“When I choose to indulge in the luxury of reading, I seek books that are thoughtful, lyrical, passionate and spiritually compelling. I have fallen deeply, hopelessly in love with Brave Fish. Thank you, friend, for sharing yourself.”
That’s what one reader posted recently on my Facebook wall (Thanks Beth!).
On Amazon, Brave Fish reached #1 in “Biographies & Memoirs-Leaders & Notable People” and #2 in “Inspirational Spirituality” during this promotional period.
All my books, including Brave Fish, are free for download on Amazon through tomorrow June 27th.