How do we respond when we make a mistake? When our actions are repulsive? Ironically it is a chance to receive the grace to contemplate Jesus. Our tiny drop of revulsion is multiplied infinitely and placed upon the Lamb of God. How did God the Father let His Son take the blame? It’s placing the blame and punishment on the innocent. Only God can do such a thing. Only His Son could have satisfied this role. Only God can create such an act of mercy and perfection. Perfect justice. All debts paid at once. But when we reject this truth we let our pride and insecurity win.
We keep repeating the same hurtful behavior over and over again. We let our bad habits control us. We refuse to let old wounds heal.
We can choose how these circumstances form us. One option is the “Why me?” position which leads to the fortification of insecurity and pride. The other is to let our heart be broken. When your heart is broken, the Light can shine into it and out from it. Love can enter and love can be set free. Psalm 42 helps me understand this process today… and it brought forth this prayer:
My soul thirsts for you my Lord. I feel my heart broken and I want to close it tight and protect myself from all that hurts me. But then I close my heart to You, oh, Lord. So let it remain broken, and open. Then You can see inside me and come inside to heal. I remember better times when Your glory shined so brilliantly that I shouted out joy and praise. But now, in the darkness of my shame and insecurity, is it all just a dream? My soul thirsts for you my Lord. Your heavenly cup flows over me gently and my broken heart aches for You. Restore me. Let me come to rest upon You. You never leave me.
God prepares us for greater challenges. But the internal victory must be won first. So here we throw down and let fly. Our pride, our ego… must be ground to dust. His Spirit can then fill us with divine strength and authority to slay the serpents and the demons that stand in our way. Let His glory reign.
Stages of a broken heart (taken from various sources… stages of grief or recovery, etc..)