Too busy

The other day I was planning to pray. But I didn’t want to. I tried to blame it on the worries of the world, but deep down I knew there was another reason. Work, family, the knee-high grass growing in the yard… there are things to be done I told myself.

But in my heart I knew the real reason…

I simply did not want to pray.

In a way, yes, the world suffocates my desire to commune with the Lord. But I willingly join in.

But God is good. He gave me the will to force myself upon my knees. Yes, it was forced.

Like forcing yourself to get up and go to work. Or forcing yourself to study or to get physically fit.

Or facing a crisis in your family… or in your life…

These things are not always done joyfully… we don’t skip gleefully towards Calvary. But only there will we find Victory.

So there I was, forced down upon my knees. Sleepy, tired, frustrated, distracted… everything but in ecstasy…

I wanted to pray for myself… for my selfish needs. “Please help me Lord,” I began to plead. But then I was moved to pray for others. To give. Only the Spirit can do this kind of thing to my selfish flesh.

And I prayed.

It was one of the greatest days of my life.

My exterior life is pretty stable (for now). No major crisis. But a great battle was won that day over the enemy who tries to keep me off my knees.

That day, I cried out, “Yes Lord! I need you! We need you!”

“Have mercy on us!”

Never let the world suffocate your cry.

Cry out to Him.

Nothing

When you are left with nothing, when everything is gone. Everything. Who are you then?

What happens when you lose all your possessions? Your house, your car, your money… All your books and phones and gadgets… gone in the blink of an eye.

What happens then?

Your job… gone. Your family… gone. Even your clothing… gone.

That’s right. You might as well be dead.  In fact, you will be dead someday.

And it will all be gone.

You will stand naked. Alone.

Or not?

Will you wait until then to see you are God’s child?

A child he loves with the greatest love story ever told?

Why wait until you are dead?

Instead, live forever. Know that you are a child of God.

Jesus died. He rose again. For you.

image credits: nothing: http://rootfun.net/wallpapers/animated-wallpapers-2013/attachment/i-see-nothing-wallpaper/

praise: http://www.klove.com/blog/post/2010/10/11/God-Rocks!-K-LOVEs-Day-of-Praise!.aspx

That’s it

Evil has been done in name of religion, yes. And done in the name of anything else you might imagine as well.

But the transformation of the wretched into something good?

The naturally good are good. The naturally bad are bad.

But what of the man transformed? From where does he come?

I am that wretched man.

Look into your heart. Who are you?

Have you been wounded? Have you been healed?

I might be tempted to close my mouth; after all, the Spirit does all the work.

But still I push forward and onward, as my God wills me to do so. He is a good God. He is a just God. Such pure goodness makes me tremble in fear.

Are you ashamed of anything?

Are you so indifferent to God’s love?

Only Christ can save us.

Why should I believe this? Why should anyone? It must be God.

I try to make it fancy with my words. I try to be a faithful salesman. But it is all vanity.

God’s loves us so he sent his Son who died for our sins. He rose from the dead. We must repent, have faith and believe in Him.

That’s it.

image credit: http://lthomason.wordpress.com/2012/04/01/to-praise-a-devotion/

Steps of Faith, Raising Teens

The raising of our teenage sons is often very difficult for me. Call it whatever you like — the pressures of today’s society, immaturity or weakness — either way there have been moments of profound doubt.

There are times when I just want to bury my head in the sand and hope that it will be alright. But this is only denial. Then there are times when I am overbearing and controlling. Here immaturity rules. Sometimes, in my heart, I am a coward. The coward picks conflict only where there is an easy kill. He never faces down Goliath.

When I include God in the process it makes a huge difference. When he is present I know when to say I’m sorry, and I know when to say no.

One night my teenage son desperately wanted to go out with friends that were not good for him. During those dark days a cloud hung over our home. My son was at a very vulnerable time in his life, and was open to many negative influences. He raged all around the house. All my flesh urged me to let him go, because otherwise I had to fight a hard fight. I wanted to fall back on the hope that it would be alright.

Many times before I used excuses like: you have to let him grow, you can’t control him, he has to learn from experience… and so on. In many cases these are wise words, but my instinct that night told me to protect my son.

The kid has this uncanny ability to practically read my mind, or maybe it’s my heart. If I am feeling violent inside, he goes with this, and we end up like two monkeys screaming at each other. If he senses weakness, he ups the volume.

That night though, I began to pray intensely in my heart. I silently repeated over and over, “I love you son. I trust you Lord”. And when my son entered my heart, despite his intense rage, he found love and trust in God. It was a great victory because even in my weakness I held my ground. My weakness made me depend on the great strength of the Lord.

But not all is victory. There are moments of miserable failure. You feel like a worm and beat yourself silly thinking, “How can I be such a fool? What kind of example am I giving?” And you cling to the desire to save face but knowing deep down that you were wrong.

The enemy appears here on cue. He slides up next to you and feeds you all kinds of delicious poison. “Your kid is full of disrespect. He deserves to be punished.” Or “Look at you, what a sorry excuse for a father you are. You call yourself a Christian? How pathetic.”

The temptation is to fall into despair and let the devil win. But when I turn back to Christ, I immediately feel the light and the hope of his full goodness. He instructs me, and he heals me. It isn’t sugar coated. It is restoration.

In the end, this is an even bigger victory: In my failure, realizing that God’s grace acts in my life. Only he can deliver this crushing blow to the temptation to believe otherwise.

Indeed. All things will be well.

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Image credits: chicken: http://proverbsthirtyonewoman.blogspot.com.ar/2012/07/how-to-train-chickens.html#.USdtOKW6dZc

sky: http://everfaith.org/2009/05/26/shaped-in-the-storms-wake/

Inspirational words

So utterly sweet, there can be no other,

In his arms I have found my lost brother.

I am forever lost in my pilgrimage into you,

Wider and deeper as only your Spirit can unwind me.

How great, how sweet you are,

All of me runs to you and falls into you.

In my nothingness I have found the greatest meaning.

My decreasing just being,

And you increasing by just knowing you.

There can be no other.

There can be no sweeter love than this.

…

…

These are the instances, the moments when our faith is most alive. In the ecstasy of his light, brilliant bath of love.

…

…

Playground maturity

We all like to think that we are mature persons. I like to think that I am. However, to reach true maturity we must go through various stages, and many times we get stuck for years or even decades in one stage.

A person’s true level of maturity shows when they are insulted or injured. The immediate reaction is a cry for justice. So when a child is attacked, they return fire. “He’s bothering me. That’s why I hit him,” is the all too familiar excuse we parents hear.

Eventually, we understand intellectually that this is wrong. We can’t go around punching everyone that annoys us. If someone bothers us we measure our words and try to remain calm. And for the most part we can handle everyday situations with intellectual force. This is the phase where I have spent most of my time.

What happens though when someone hits a nerve? What happens when my adolescent son confronts me? For some, those of the opposite political party invite a special ire. Or maybe it is a brother or sister that we feel is making a serious mistake. Sometimes simply being cut off in traffic sends us into a fit of rage.

If you want to take a true assessment of your level of maturity, think of a person or situation that really bothers you. Examine your reaction. Have you regressed back to the playground mentality?

Root Causes

The root of our emotion is a cry for justice, but we want to take justice into our own hands. Deep down, we might even desire the death of the transgressor. At very least we would love to see them “put in their place”. Beginning with the death of Abel, much blood has been spilled from the rage for justice as we see fit.

The highest level of maturity — where compassion is the reaction to attack or insult — this is the way of Jesus. Once in a while we walk with him, but many times we don’t.

Jesus got mad too, in the temple, when vendors were selling animals that people could buy to offer as a sacrifice for their sins. He was furious at the notion that God’s forgiveness could be purchased.

We can never forgive or be forgiven with intellectual gymnastics. We stifle our cry for justice and pretend to be calm; while inside we cry out for blood.

The Lord hears our cry. He hears the cry for justice. In the most unexpected way he offers, once and for all, the blood that all our immaturity and sin cry out for.

Power, Love and a Sound Mind

This is not about being weak, accommodating or enabling. The strength required here is supernatural and only comes through prayer or perhaps by a special grace. True maturity is where all you want to do is give of yourself to help the other. This is not surrender, but victory in love. Here you act with clarity and decisiveness. Here you act with calm. Here you act with power and grace.

I pray to God to give me a mature heart. A merciful heart.

Why do we reject the best part?

The world views matters of faith from many different perspectives. Some see it as merely a way to pattern our lives better. Others liken it to a type of drug, as Karl Marx famously wrote, “Religion is the opiate of the masses”. Some see the Christian faith as a sinister way to control people. All of these interpretations are correct to one degree or another. Sadly, many Christians, willingly or unwillingly, adopt these lifestyles in their faith as well.

Why do we reject the best part? Why do we reject that it is about salvation and eternal life, and that all other things must be left behind? We say that Jesus is our Savior. Our Savior from what I ask? Given the price that was paid it must be from something incredibly horrible.

We want the easy part. That is our nature. The easier the better. Yes, we are willing to put in hours every day for years, toiling in bondage to our selfish desires. Wealth. Security. Psychological anesthesia. And not even the slightest whisper of dependence on God.

Perhaps this all sounds like fire and brimstone, but the seriousness of the matter cannot be denied. But we reject the seriousness of it. And in doing so we reject the best part.

It is a love so profound, that a Father was willing to transform his Son into sin for us. I imagine my son, taking the blame for the thief or the killer. Would I even sacrifice my son for a good man? My sweet little boy, flesh of my flesh. Just seeing him smile makes my entire existence brighter. Would I willingly see him killed for anyone on earth?

So we avert our eyes and our hearts. And God tells us, “Repent!” But we won’t. We harden our hearts to his indestructible love, a love so divine that legions of angels sing of it in constant praise.

Yes, there are many concrete benefits to a life of faith. Conversely, the abuse of religion has created some of humankind’s worst atrocities. But the best part is intangible and invisible. To know that you are not alone. To know that you have been saved from something incredibly horrible. To know that the Father of all creation loves you desperately.